262 The Ebbs & Flows of Running a Business | Sara Monika
Sara Monika
Documentary wedding photographer for free-spirited & sentimental couples based in Toronto
Running a business can often seem like a rollercoaster ride full of surprises — some exhilarating and others more challenging.
The ebbs and flows of entrepreneurship are inevitable: sometimes the sales are booming, other times your sales strategy needs to be re-examined; one day the income is rolling in, the next day you’re living on the edge of your seat and feel like your business is about to combust.
Despite these ups & downs, we usually wake up in the morning with a renewed zest and a passion for creation - and I know that today's guest and I share that in common.
In this podcast episode, Sara Monika and I sit down at my house to catch up on the past 12 months of business and life.
We take a look at how best to navigate through both good times & not so great ones as well as examine tips for maximizing success in any kind of situation along the entrepreneurial journey.
In this episode, we chat about:
The ups and downs of running a business
What's on our mind as we navigate Q1
What's been working (& not working) in our businesses
What our goals and dreams are for 2023
How Sara has navigated Motherhood alongside running her business
To connect with Sara
Access the transcript for this episode:
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You're listening to the visionary life podcast. I'm your host, Kelsey Rydell. Each week, I'll bring you conversations with the most visionary humans on this earth, in hopes that you'll be able to absorb their wisdom, avoid their failures and feel less alone on the roller coaster ride that is entrepreneurship. This season, I'll be chatting with creative thinkers, masterful marketers, brick and mortar shop owners, brand builders and people just like you who have a story to share or a vision that inspires. If I can share one quick secret with you before we get into the episode. It's that we all have a little bit of visionary inside of us, you know, that spark that nudges us to pursue our full potential in this lifetime. But perhaps somewhere along the line, it got covered up. I'm here to tell you that it's never too late to explore that inner voice and access the brilliance deep down inside of you. It's in you. It's in all of us. Let's dive in. Hey, visionaries. Welcome back to the show. Last Friday, I spent a day with Sarah Monica, if you don't know Sara Monica, then you could scroll back because she's actually the guest who has appeared most on visionary life, this will be her fourth time on the show. And you guys are always asking for more content from her. Sara Monica is a wedding photographer. She is an educator, she is a course creator. And I love that Sara is always looking for ways to better herself, and to better her business. And if you scroll back to any of our previous episodes, we talked so much about being authentic in your business and showing who you really are and not being afraid to work on yourself knowing that it directly impacts your business success. And today on the show, we're talking about the ebbs and flows of business, the ups and downs, the natural seasons that we all go through. And last year, Sarah had her very first son, Ben, and a lot has changed since she was last on the show. So we thought it'd be super fun. In addition to spending the day together, we were just catching up as to friends to entrepreneurs who share a lot in common personally and professionally. We don't live that far from each other. So we do like to get together once or twice a year to do a fun, cold plunge. And sometimes we'll sit down and record a podcast. And then we'll just jam on all things life and business. And we'll give each other advice on projects we're working on. It's kind of like an informal mastermind we have going on. But we in this episode are just kind of catching up on what we've been up to and what's on our mind and things that have gone well and on the other side things that maybe haven't gone so well. So really excited. We'll get right into the episode. If you haven't connected with Sarah, she's very active on Instagram. You can go find her there using the link in the show notes. And of course if you are looking for a wedding photographer and elopement photographer, Sara is your girl if you live in Ontario, so I cannot recommend her enough. She is amazing at her craft. And in addition, I'm just very grateful to call her a friend and a colleague. So let's dive right into this week's episode with Sara Monica.
Three to one. It feels like a steal. Every time I clap to start the pod recording. All right. So what's up, Kelsey?
Are we live? Or what's up is that we are just coming back to regular temperature after doing a polar plunge. It's January. Jan we just went in the river. How do you feel?
Hello? Hello. Sorry, just testing the wind. I feel so good. Like I feel energized and I have this like like you said residual chill in my body. But I feel cozy at the same time. Yeah, and I love how awake my body feels physically. Like it's just that like you were talking about earlier like stagnant energy Yeah. Of how it's like, it's so hard to be creative or inspired or confident in your ideas even from a place of stagnant energy. So I'm just like, oh, this is why we did the cold plunge first and then we're like that we're gonna just podcast and have fun and feel energized.
So I've heard a lot of people say that like if you can get into cold water and stay in there for a minute or two. Everything else you do that day feels a little bit easier because it's pretty chaotic. When you submerge into icy cold water. I know a lot of people are probably like that's crazy. Why would you put yourself through that but I do think there is something to be said for challenging yourself to do things that make you that uncomfortable because then all of your Monday Your tasks and the things that you have to do in your work for the rest of the day kind of feels a little bit easier and like it almost takes the edge off of everything else that's to follow.
It's so true. I feel like you just feel so badass. And I'm not gonna lie. I'm still shivering right now. I'm like holding this mic. I'm just like,
we're chattering our teeth on this podcast. At least people know why. And we had
to turn off the heat, because we didn't want to affect the audio. So we're like, I didn't realize we'd have to turn off.
We're gonna go get blankets at intermission. Just have them draped all over us. Yeah, like a little fire. And then we'll continue our recording. Yeah.
So this is a different little like recording that we just decided to spontaneously record because we want to hang out because we're both like, Okay, whenever we hang out, we exchange such amazing, powerful ideas, we get so inspired for our business, we have so many like, values and things that we're passionate about aligned, so let's hang out. And then last night, I texted you, I was like, Hey, do you want to randomly like recorded podcast because every time we hang out and talk, it's like, fuck, that should have been podcast episode that was so good. And so we're literally just going to be like, chatting as if we're just chatting here and bringing you guys along on the ride. And actually, we did have a random idea. Because we're like, we had such great conversations before we even sat down. And every every, like, 30 minutes, we're like, dammit, that should have been we should have been recording already. Right? But then we're like, Okay, what's our intention? Like, let's let's figure out like a more of a direction of intention for our chat. So what do we have for everyone? We're gonna talk
about the natural ebbs and flows of business. But I think also of life. I mean, you and I have known each other probably about five years now. And we've been through a lot of life and business together. And it hasn't all been easy. And I think the one thing that I really appreciate about our friendship is that we don't sugarcoat anything. Yes, we have big goals and big dreams. And obviously, when we get together, we love to celebrate the progress that we've made. But we're also truthful with each other about the things that are flops or the things that are not working, or the fact that there are weeks that go by where we're just like, I don't know, what the eff I'm doing or what to do next, or I feel stuck. And I think it's easy in this world where, you know, we'd like to show up on social media and create content from an inspired state. But I think it's important to also shine a spotlight on the fact that like, we never have it all figured out. There are moments or seasons, or weeks or days that pass by where things just don't make sense. And you may not have all the answers, but maybe that's why it's so important to have friendships and peers who understand and can kind of help you navigate through those chapters.
Yeah, that's so true. Like, I remember when I got I said, I remember when as if it was like years ago, this was literally an hour ago.
I remember when I saw you 30 minutes ago,
I remember when we came up with the idea of talking about the natural ups and downs in business. I remember that. No, like what what like, inspired me and and what came to mind then was like that. I just went through like, some ups and downs myself of like, not having clarity of what I want for the next year and taking a month and a half sabbatical for myself away from business away from work and feeling like this. Like it's so rare for me to do that. Now think about work that I felt in a way like I was like, failing because no ideas were coming to me and, and then after I was done the sabbatical, it's like, holy shit, like, Okay, I'm still fucking shivering. Like, can you hear me shivering? I'm like, if you're watching this on YouTube, I'm like, okay, Kelsey, tend to get me a blanket. But so yeah, I was just like, feeling this like, I guess what my down that I'm going to talk about is that like, feel depressed feeling even when you're so confused on what to do next, and where to go next. And you have no clarity. It could be really could feel defeating, because maybe you've had, you know, a lot of clarity in your business up until this point. I mean, I've been in business for 11 years and I've only had ups and downs ups and downs moments of clarity, moments of non clarity and I was just, I'm just riding that roller coaster and I just recently experienced the down again, where it's like, you have those butterflies in your tummy of like, what's going to happen that like kind of fear of like, Wait, like, Will I have more ideas? Well Hello, I know how to keep going. And yeah, I just wanted to share that because I it's such a natural process. And I know especially for photographers right now in offseason it's very much like, holy crap. It's kind of offseason, where's my money coming from? Where's my business coming from? Especially around the holidays when everyone's just like hanging out with family, they're not even usually thinking about booking services, December can be such a quiet month. And I know I used to spiral down during that time. So yeah, that's what kind of like inspired is just like being real with you all in this chapter of what I'm going through and, and how to even get out of it. Because I know for me, what I did was decided instead of freaking out and being like, but what if I don't get any ideas? What like, what's happening? I asked myself, okay, what is creating pain? For me right now. And for me, it was uncertainty. So I asked myself, okay, what would give me certainty? Then Then my brain automatically answered the question because our subconscious mind answers whatever questions we ask it. So you got to ask it quality questions. And it answered, get quiet, go inward. Meditate, journal, be honest with what you really want. Don't think of how you're going to get what you want. Just think of what you want and why. And so I did that, and then got quiet, and I rested some more. And I just reflected, and I played around with brainstorming and having fun and not feeling like this brings this idea and brainstorming right now I have to be married to and that's going to be the idea for my business next year. It's like, No, I'm just still brainstorming. And then this week has been such a powerful week, so much clarity has come my way. And I feel like I'm on that high again. Like I'm just like, riding the upper the roller coaster. I'm like, yes. Now I know what's happening. And so yeah, I just wanted to share that because, like, it could it could happen as quickly as two weeks ago, I was feeling so down so confused, not sure where I'm going to two weeks later, feeling so much clarity and confidence. It could be within two weeks, it could take five months, six months, it could take for it could take years. It just depends. But yeah, that's kind of like where I'm at right now with my like, ebb and flow my down my up experience in this moment, right now, there's obviously so many more stories. But, Kelsey, what comes to mind for you about like, anything that comes to mind in your business where it's either a high or a low?
Yeah, that Yeah, well, I think it's important to recognize too, that like, half of your life is going to be spent above the line, so to speak, and half is below. Like, if we think of this baseline kind of when you are having a day that's just going according to plan, everything's good. But nothing is like outstandingly wonderful, but nothing's horribly bad, you're gonna have, you know, half of your life slightly above the line half slightly below. So I think to expect that you'll never ebb and flow is something that we all kind of need to release, and that it's okay to have these times when you're just kind of like shit, I don't know what to do. And I honestly admit, I've been so naive to that, because when the pandemic first started, I almost had this like, burst of energy. And I was like, Okay, I'm gonna be in massive momentum and massive action and be of service to people. And it felt like for two years, I was just kind of running on adrenaline. And I was loving my work. And I was helping a lot of people get their online marketing figured out, this was during the pandemic, or before during the pandemic, so kind of from 2020 to 2022. And I had no problem with motivation, like everything was just in flow. And that is a really great feeling. And, you know, looking back on that chapter, I don't know what was happening. But like, every day, I woke up with a fire and then approaching October, so maybe about four or so months ago. I just hit this moment, which I know you've experienced to zero where I was just like, No, I don't know what to do. I'm bored. I felt lost. I felt low motivation. And I felt stuck in my routine. And I realized that I'd kind of been doing the same thing every day for two years. There was not a lot of excitement outside of work, I guess. Well, there was but something just kind of came to a halt. And I had to similar to you ask myself the question of what do I need right now? And that wasn't something that I had really asked myself before and
I'm going to move my body while you do that.
And when I got quiet, I heard that you need to okay, I don't know how to phrase this in a way that doesn't sound slutty because I'm married but yeah, If the answer was you need to go like, wake up in a different bed, as in you need to go travel and like shake up your routine to the point where you open your eyes. And you don't know where you're going to have coffee that day, you don't know where you're going to open your laptop and work. So I made a decision that if I wanted to ebb and flow through the next chapter of my life and business with excitement, that I just needed to like, shake things up. And so I decided to book three separate trips in a matter of six weeks. And I just got on planes, and I texted friends. And I ended up traveling twice in November and once in December, because that's what my inner voice was saying was like, you can't just be bored in your routine and expect that you're going to get creative ideas. So I am so glad that I asked myself that question and heard the answer of like, get out and live Kelsey, like, Stop, you know, staying stuck in the routine that's making you bored and miserable. So yeah, I mean, that was my recent kind of dip. But I think asking that question of, what do I need right now is really the most powerful thing you can do in that moment.
That's so cool. Isn't it so interesting how something can work for us for so long. And then out of nowhere, it just doesn't work feel stagnant. Something needs to change something. Yes, a shift. And it's like, it's in a way. It's like, it's so funny how we can react in such a scared way. But really, it's such a gift, because it's just our souls or whatever communicating with us. Hey, it's time for something new, some something different. So
can I ask you a question? Yeah. What is something you feel like you need to give up this year? That's no longer serving you. It could be anything
like that question. I'm so cold. I'm never normally this cold after a frickin thing. It's because I'm normally moving my body not sitting down. I'm called to but I have one you have one heir to. Next time, maybe we'll record a podcast. Maybe if I can record a podcast on walking or like doing squats, but it's okay, you guys, I can share more layers. So I don't know. It's just good. I'm just gonna friction my feet together. And no, I'm not avoiding your question. Okay. I love that question. Say it again. Because I really want to
Yeah, like, you know, things often come to a point where they're no longer serving us, whether it's friendships, whether it's, I don't like the house I live in, whether it's a routine, maybe you were going to high intensity workouts every day and 2022. And then you wake up one day, and you're like, This doesn't feel good in my body. So what is something you feel you need to give up? Maybe you're still doing it right now. But you're like, This isn't serving Sarah of the future.
I know, the what came to me right away, is saying no longer playing small.
Expand on that.
So I have told this to you earlier today. And I'm like, this is coming up again. But like, when the pandemic first hit, like I told you, I think it was 2017 1819 Those years felt so powerful to me, I felt like I was so confident who I was how I was showing up in my business, I had so much clarity on how to be I really didn't care what other photographers were doing. other business owners were doing, I was just like, intuitively moving through my own flow my own decisions, and it led me to like, so much abundance in like joy, energy, financial abundance in my business, like dream clients, all that stuff, right? And then the pandemic hit. And I started just noticing how people were like pointing fingers at each other blaming being so judgmental. You know, judging for example, in our photography community, there were photographers judging other photographers for offering these like porch sessions during lockdown where they would like shoot a family from like, the sidewalk to the porch. And people would be like, That's irresponsible. Like, what if someone coughs on the air blows like the wind towards the family and the family gets sick? And like we were in that point where we were so unsure of what this like disease was. I understand the fear that concern right, but but it was just like, so toxic. Yeah. And I was like, for the first time, I was scared that I would be judged for showing up as who I was. Because it seemed as though if like everyone was being judged for all different things, like no matter what people did, people were being judged and I understand, like, there was a whole like, fear thing, and climate, all of that. But I was like wait, like, No, I'm going to turtle and I'm like, I'm just going to turtle. Just for now. I don't like drama and avoid it's not productive. I'm just gonna turtle I'm gonna just like go inward. I'm gonna be cozy inside at home was Rory whatever, but that turtling ended up like turning into a two year turtling. Yeah, and a lot of you might actually those of you that are, you know, listeners to my podcast, you might be surprised to hear that because you might see me in a different way. And I've wanted to talk about this for a while, but I've been scared. But this is my pocket moment. Or should I say forget? Yeah, I'm just like, I'm just so over. Like that, missing that authentic Sarah. And I've been showing up authentically, like, don't get me wrong. It's just I've been playing small, like, I could have been playing so much bigger, I've could have voiced my opinions, my beliefs so much more I could have been, you know, helping even more photographers on a higher, better level. I was doing my best. But yeah, that whole like judgment space of how I think you've all noticed that during the pandemic, it got really dark. And there's a lot of like, judgments even I, I just seem to notice even more cyber bullying. And I really was so scared of that. So I kind of turtled and I'm finally realizing like, literally, I'm just like, really big, being like reborn again, in a new way. And becoming that like fearless stare I used to be. So there was this like, there was a Sarah pre COVID. And then there was a Sarah, during COVID. And now I just had to refine myself. And that's what can be a little like, something I want to really pass on is like a huge lesson from this is that it can be really dangerous to choose to turtle at any moment, even if your intention is to turtle for a month or two. Because that was my intention. I'm like, okay, for now, I'm just gonna get quiet. I don't want to use my voice. I don't want to whatever, right? And it's okay to do that and get off social media to get space. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about like, a deeper level. It's like, why are you turtling? You have to ask yourself that question. So as an example, as a metaphor, to paint the picture better. When I first got braces, right? I could have turtled I could have been like, Oh, my God, look at my mouth. Like, this doesn't feel like me. I'm scared. People are gonna judge me. I'm supposed to be a wedding photographer. Like, how are people going to take me seriously, when I go to weddings? I look like I'm freaking 16 Because I have a younger looking face. And then on top of that, but race is like I literally could have looked 16 And it's like, how are these people going to trust me to take like great pictures. And it's like, not about my couples, because I think my you know, the couples do their due diligence with who they hire, but like the parents, how am I going to earn their respect and all of that, right? I could have gone down that rabbit hole and been scared. And guess what, when you when you feel actually that energy of turtling, and you're not that confident yourself and you're in your head about braces or whatever, then guess what you show up to a wedding day. And that's the energy you bring. And guess what you attract law of attraction, like energy attracts like energy, not just positive, but also attracts literally like energy. So if you're not feeling confident, guess what you're gonna attract the family and friends, maybe even a couple of not feeling confident in you, because there is a lack of confidence in you. So I had this like, very pivotal, decisive moment. As soon as I got my braces on, I remember I was sitting in the chair, getting them on and at the end, if I can bring out the mirror to do this publicly. Like, okay, I saw it in the mirror. And I had the thought of like, oh, no, no, I have to have this for two years, what I'm gonna do, and then I shut it down. I was like, Nope, you're not gonna talk to the voice, like it was a separate entity. I was like, You're not gonna bring me down, you're not gonna hold me back. I want to be even more confident than I've ever been. And I know what I offer. And braces don't matter. Like it's the energy I bring. So from this moment, I'm going to be confident the whole time with braces. And it was that decisive moment that led me actually embodying that confidence. Throughout the whole two and a half years, I had braces. And guess what those years were the years of 2017 and 18. So like I mentioned, those are my most powerful, confident years. And so you know, some people might think, Oh, if I get braces, it's going to limit my business capabilities, all of that I had my biggest like growth periods during that time. So my lesson here that I learned is, like, Don't Turtle out of the fear of what the external world thinks of you. So I want to talk so much more on my podcast and in general in my teaching courses, everything about the subconscious mind manifestation spirituality energetics, the feminine energy but on top of that, also the logical stuff, right the step by step how to actually, you know, create this photo or like, there's space for both. And I think I've just been like playing it safe. And, and I'm actually really grateful for this lesson because I get to pass it down to everybody. So it's like not a regret. But it is a little painful because it's really not fun. Not feeling free to be your authentic self, because I experienced it so deeply at one point. And then I experienced the opposite. And so now I'm like, This is my fucking year, my year of the word, my year of the word here, my word Word. Word of the Year word of the year is alignment. So aligned action, goodwill, and it's in alignment with me what I want. And I know that as long as I'm in alignment with myself, and my soul, I'm for sure going to be able to help other people in the way I'm meant to. Yeah, instead of like overthinking it, but on top of that, I can take aligned action in ways that's going to take care of my soul, my body, like through movement, exercise, meditation, waking up when I want to wake up and just doing things for me. And if I know if I want to teach a course a certain way, or take photos a certain way, I know that's coming from this place of like, my own intuitive inspiration. And that's the gift I meant to give. So it's been this whole like, journey. That was a long answer. But But I say what was I saying? No more playing small,
no more small. And I mean, it is it like it brought this visual to mind for me that so many, not just entrepreneurs, but just human beings on this earth, they're walking around with their own light, dimmed, right? Like, because of our fear of judgment, or people saying mean things to us, or we're worried about the opinions of our parents or aunts or uncles, what we tend to do is take the best version of ourselves and say, Well, you know what, people won't like me if I'm my true self. So I'm just going to dim my own light. And that ripples into everything else you do, and that can stay with you for years to come. And, you know, you're lucky that you've had this kind of epiphany moment or self awareness to recognize like, I don't want to live like this forever. Like I am playing small or you call it what swirling,
swirling. Oh, no squirrels, my spirit animals. I am a squirrel. Squirrel, or what did I say?
You said I've been
like turtle a turtle a squirrel? Oh, that's so funny. You know what? It's because we saw squirrel all the way. And swirling and turtling sounds similar?
Okay. turtling Yeah, I feel like you are lucky to have caught yourself turtling after only two years, because I would imagine that not only the people listening, but people who are even further along on their life's journey. Like they may find themselves in this moment that 30 or 40 years of turtling. And they're finally waking up to the fact that I am not who I want to be or I have muted the quirkiest, most silly aspects are like the real version, the person I am at my core, I have turtled into someone different in hopes that I'm accepted by others. And I think this is such an important lesson, just in running a business in general is that if you can start to figure out what turns your light up, and things that dim your light, it can really help you to like you say to take aligned action. It's like, if I know something brings me joy, and it brings out the best version of me. I need to do more of that even if somebody is going to judge me or even if somebody is going to say a mean comment. Because that's also the thing that's going to attract a lot of like minded people, or that's going to make somebody else feel less alone. So it's like even if we feel like oh my gosh, who's going to judge me for this? Or should I say this thing? Yes, it may repel a few people. But there's also this beautiful opportunity to make a true connection with someone who's really going to deeply appreciate that you're showing up as your true self and just not afraid to shine your light because it gives them permission to be like, Oh my god, maybe I can be myself and run a business too.
So true. And something that I want to add to that. I love that you said that because I realized for some reason I thought back then in 2017 1819 I was like I've arrived I am my I am my most authentic self and I will forever be confident and you know had this like streak of that but I'm realizing He gets a fucking practice, practice, like, it's like, you can't just go to the gym for a year, and then build up to be so strong. And then you stop for the rest of your life and you're you'll stay that strong. It's literally a practice. And so any moment where I find myself being like, oh, but what will they think I'm like, Ooh, good job, you caught yourself now, what do you really want to do? And then I do the thing that I want to do. Like, for example, today, we did the polar bear dip, and two little gentlemen came over. And they're just sitting there watching us go in, or bathing suits in the cold water. And honestly, if I was by myself, that would have been way more challenging to just do it by myself. I'd be like, Oh, they're judging me, whatever. But I would be like, No, but you came here. You wanted to do this, like, do it for you? Right. But it would have been more challenging. It was easier with you, because we had each other Yeah, we could like laugh about it together. But yeah, but same question to you. That's a great question. What do you want to leave behind?
Oh, my goodness, I love this question. So much. I wish I had a prepared answer. But I think one of the things that's most top of mind is holding on to things for far too long that I know are no longer serving me. So that could be like a certain person per se that I've been just keeping in touch with, even though I feel like maybe the relationship has come to a dead end.
You know, you could tell me, you'd be honest with
me. You know, those people you like podcasts, we're
the ones that a while. Okay, you could say here on the podcast, all I could take,
this is the end of our friendship. But in a more granular, little granular level, I feel like in bringing this back to business, there are so many things that we do on a day to day basis to run a business that we often forget to challenge, like, Why do I send out two emails a week? Why do I feel like I need to show up and create on a certain platform? Why do I feel like I need to just, you know, check off any task. And I love the idea of really coming at everything with this idea of first principles thinking of, is this the thing I should be doing? Or is there a true reason are, you know, and that reason could be I love it, in that case, great. But if you look at something that you've just been doing on autopilot, and you ask yourself, do I still need to do this in 2023? And if you get that immediate, subconscious answer of No, I want to release it right then in there versus being like, No, this is just like something I do in a week. So I guess it's the thing that I want to, like bring in to 2023 is the ability to release things quickly, versus taking months and months to revamp. Something in my business.
That's amazing. I love that. Yeah, conscious. So do you have a word do you have a year?
I have a word every year and this one came to me so quickly. The word is rhythm. Because when I think of rhythm, I think of music. And I feel like a song that has a good rhythm. Like you're, you're just flowing through it right and you never want it to end. And you almost don't even realize how good a rhythm feels. You just find yourself moving your body and things are just going. And then if the song ends and goes to a different song that has no rhythm, you're like, Oh, now I don't feel as good. And I want that same feeling every day in my life of just like, I wake up and I'm literally just like on the beat because I'm doing things that bring me joy. There's a rhythm to my business. So every season we have similar program launches, there's a rhythm to the way I respond to clients like it's every Monday at 9am not 24/7 So I feel like if I can just bring that rhythmic energy to everything I do, it's just gonna keep me like bobbing
like you are right now like I literally
the word has infected me, I don't know.
When you're explaining it right away, you lit up so number one, that's a good word for you. It's a good year of the word for you and then you're like, just for those of you that are watching on YouTube Oh my god.
I'm just gonna be working on my desk all yours.
Can you record a whole podcast episode go
on YouTube and see how many people click off within the first like 10 seconds being like,
does she have like a 10? No, no, that would be like, you'd want to pay attention you would wait, how long could you do that for? Oh my gosh, that's
a word of the year. Yeah. And okay, so
you have so you have this urge to so obviously leave you wanting to release things that no longer feel good to you? Yes, or feel off or feel like you've outgrown it? Yeah, it feels like it's going to put you in that rhythm of like listening to yourself and your intuition, and yeah, all of that. So what, what is something that you're gonna make sure to do in a moment where you're like, ooh, something is telling me, I've outgrown this, I need to either delegate it or delete it, or, you know, what, what are you going to do in that moment?
Have you been thinking about hiring a marketing coach, maybe you got into business because you want it to actually do your thing. But you actually find yourself worrying about marketing and stressing about sales and where your next client is going to come from? Well, marketing isn't your expertise. We know that, but it is mine. And I love to help you stay on top of the latest marketing trends, and know where to focus your time and your limited energy. So I take on a handful of clients every single month for a four month marketing coaching experience. And this is for the business owner who feels overwhelmed with their marketing strategy. They're not sure how to spend their time and they just don't know where to show up. They're wondering, should they have a blog and a podcast? How to grow your email newsletter? Are they getting traffic to their website from Google? Is their SEO even updated? What should you say anytime you need to make a sale or communicate a promotion, I want to help you build out your 12 month annual year at a glance marketing plan, and then break it down into super actionable steps for you. As your marketing coach, I not only am going to meet with you on a weekly basis, but I'm going to tell you exactly what to do, you'll have precise next steps so that you feel super confident in just four months that your marketing strategy is in place. And you're seeing your business growth on an upward trajectory. If you want to learn more about marketing coaching, head to Kelsey rydell.com, and click the work with me tab. And you can learn all about it there. I've also written a blog post for you. I have a free live masterclass for you. So you can do all your digging, and learn about marketing coaching and whether it is right for you. So again, Kelsey rydell.com Last chance to enroll for the 2022 season, and I cannot wait to start working with you. Hmm. That's a good question in that moment, okay. So I'm like trying to picture myself so I encounter a task and my day that I'm like, this is no longer serving me, I think the best thing to do is to like immediately ask for help, which is maybe something that I haven't been good at in the past. But like, if I can't immediately figure out what to do with it. It's like enlisting support. So that doesn't mean necessarily hiring or outsourcing. But asking somebody else who's encountered the same challenge, I feel like, as business owners who work from home, we can get stuck in our head that we have to figure everything out by ourselves. Why couldn't I just pick up the phone and call you and be like, Hey, have you ever encountered this before? Or do you know what to do when you hit this kind of roadblock in business? So asking, keeping conversations open with friends and people who get it? And yeah, not feeling like I have to do everything alone, like constantly figuring out things, and instead just tap into people who have the answers, because they've gone through it before.
That's so good. I feel so like, I resonate with that so much, because I also, like, there comes a point where it's like problem solving on your own, it's just exhausting that you stopped doing it. And you're just like, Okay, this is just how my business is running now. And it's like, there's a way to run it, where it feels like a well oiled machine, it feels good. And it's like, okay, it's all good. If everything makes sense, and you just feel good, you could just have fun and flow, but then there's gonna come a time where something needs to change and shift like maybe a new software is available that's actually more efficient, or, like so many different ways, solutions. And in that moment, it could be like, it's gonna take so much effort to like, figure this out and whatever. But it doesn't have to be so hard. Like, what if, you know, we asked ourselves, what could it look like? If it were easy? Who can I ask or like, even though, like who, what, when, where how questions could get you started? Like, who can I ask? Like, where can I research or, like, how can I problem solve and just set up a 10 minute timer and problem solve, right?
Well, even before we started recording today, we were talking about online courses, and I was telling you, oh, I would like to package up the visionary method into some version of a digital course. And in my head, it was just like, overwhelmed, overwhelmed, overwhelmed. And so you pulled up your laptop, you logged into your online course portal, and just showed me like the I can have your system. And immediately my brain went from overwhelmed to I can do this. But had we not been chatting, I still would have been thinking of all that I have to do and how am I ever going to pull this together. But I think when you have people who you can tap into who have already solved that problem, you can basically download like the quick and easy version of, hey, this is what you're going to create. Yes, it's not going to be like the simplest thing, but it is possible. And here's how I did it.
Yeah, it's so true. Like I even even last time we met up you like gave me I was so stuck on how to get help with writing copywriting and all that. And then I just talked to you, we hung out for like, five, six hours, and I got so much clarity. And then I found the best freaking copywriter ever. And she helped me so much last year when I had my new little Ben baby band and I was still shooting weddings. Oh my God, it was just like a game changer. So yeah, like community is so powerful like
myself back to that after the pandemic like true, you know, we almost just got used to like living this life of solitude and wake up every day, do your workout by yourself. And you know, don't go visit neighbors, because we're all staying inside and then sit at your laptop and do zoom calls. But I almost want to reverse all of that and do more in person stuff in 2023. And I've been thinking, I got invited to do a virtual one day mastermind and my immediate response was no, but if this were in person, because I thought it was going to be I was an immediate Yes. So I just could tell my body was craving that in person interaction. And I know that for me, the next step is just getting back into the real world and fostering those true partnerships, relationships, whether it's for work or otherwise, but I'm just craving in 2023, that rhythm of getting back into life and learning from the world. Right, from the experiences that I have on a daily basis.
That's yeah, I can feel that. You had the in person stuff. I miss that. Yeah,
I know. Are you planning to go to any in person conferences in the future? Or is that not some I don't have
anything planned this year. I think it's because last year, Rory was on maternity leave. And this year, I really want to like Like, he just supported the crap out of me, he was so unbelievable. And I really want to be that like pillar for him this year, because he's returning back to work. And I want to make sure he like, gets his focus time and all of that. And you know what it is? I feel like I've absorbed so much knowledge and I've learned so much and I'm just ready to apply and like, share with all of my listeners. And so I I feel like I'm like at a point where I'm a learned out. Oh, yeah. So much to give. I'm like exploding, and I'm excited. So that's where I'm at. So I think the conference thing doesn't like resonate, but definitely like, hanging out with more people. And yeah, yeah. It's exciting. Yeah, one thing that I mean, actually, I'm probably gonna say this word nother episode, because that's a whole nother thing. The R R. R R T that I discovered. I'm just gonna, that's a whole nother topic. But that has made me realize, yeah, so Okay, in quick and short, everybody I worked through like a really big block that I've had for 14 years, which was kind of like fear of like, deeper connection, nurturing relationships. And so now that I've kind of like healed that part of myself, it's so interesting how I am an introverted person, like I need time alone to think and like, recharge, but I also have had this burst of like this need of more community and connection. So it's so fascinating. So we're pretty aligned with that. So that's pretty cool.
Yeah, yeah, I don't know if that's just a product of what we've all gone through over the past few years. But I also think there comes a time like this, like anything there are see that seasons of business and there are times when you have to like go deep into your creative cave, and just work and like have a strong goal and output so much to get towards it. And then there are times when you can kind of sit back and go, I have created something really awesome. And now I want to get out and talk to people so that I can get inspired. And like see what everybody else is up to because some little nugget that somebody says in some conversation is probably going to land with me and it's going to give me my next big idea. Right? And I feel like that is facilitated through conversation because it's like by nature the word mastermind is when more than one mind or brain come together. And when you talk with one other person or To other people, the outcomes of a conversation can be exponentially greater than you using one mind to try and think of something right. Yeah. And I think we so often undervalue the potential of getting multiple minds in a room and talking because that conversation is going to go places that you yourself, you literally just would never get there. And you can't even
imagine a buyer can't even guess
where it would go can't because like, it's like quantum when you get multiple people together. I don't even know if quantum leap is the right term. But like those brain cells together can just make magic that is not possible. When you stay by yourself, like
you just gave me an idea right now, like you say, that shifted my perspective on this whole intention, actually, of this episode of how we're saying, the seat when I first was like, Hey, should we do an episode on like, the ups and downs, the natural ups and downs of business? And then we also have the natural ebb and flow of business. But it's like, Why did I think of it notch? Like, for me, I was thinking of it as ups and downs, and I was thinking of it as bad and good. I was doubting that too. Yeah. Like UPS being like, good. A good moment. Yeah. In time and down being like, ooh, bad, dark, right. But like, now that you said that for some reason. It's like, it's like, why can't we look at it as seasons? Yeah. And it's all necessary. And it all plays a part. And yeah, it's such a such a gift. Like, there's literally beauty in every season. And what if we embrace it instead of resisted it? Because the more resistance we actually put out, the more what do they say what you resist persists. So if you're resisting, change, and it's uncomfortable, and you're like, I'm scared, I don't want this to change, then it's going to continue to feel uncomfortable and scary, and you won't find the beauty or excitement in it. And then like, yeah, man, this whole past year has just been a mindfuck. For me, like, becoming a mall. I totally underestimated like the shift in me as a human in such an amazing way, like, so many hard moments. But then, as we even said earlier today, it's like, so many of the hardest things in life are the most rewarding, like, for example, the cold plunge, it's so fucking hard, but it's so rewarding after because then you realize how much you can do. And then your body feels great. You feel energized, like so many benefits. So like, it's like, what if we, when we get those moments of like, seasons that feel harder? Like, if we look at it more long term? Yeah. And we like zoom out. And we see that it's just a blip on the timeline. And this is a somehow a gift. It's like, let's look for the reason in this. Let's look for the gift let's, and I know there's obviously so many scenarios, like right now I'm thinking like, okay, Abby is like 13 years old now. And she's going blind and deaf. And I can't I'm literally she's my first dog ever. Yeah, my dog is like, Oh, I can't I'm like in denial. I've been in denial for so long about it. But when she goes away one day, I don't know. I'm gonna, like, I don't know what I'm gonna do. And I don't know how. And I don't know what I'm going to. It's going to hurt so much. I'm going to miss her. But I know that there's going to be some kind of lesson as we so painful. I'm never going to want her to go right. But there's gonna be some kind of lesson of like, what did she teach me throughout her life? Did she teach me patience? So she teach me like how to be more selfless and caring when someone needs you more like when she's more blind and deaf for like, I don't know what she's going to teach me when when she goes. Yeah, I don't even know why I went there.
But like I keep thinking isn't Yeah, like the ebb and flow is always there. And it's really how we respond or react to it. And I like your analogy of zooming out on the timeline to realize that the UPS or downs are the little blips in time they are just tiny blips, but when you're in them, they feel like they're gonna last forever. But the truth is, every downswing is followed by an upswing, right? It's like that visual of a pendulum like it's gonna go down, but that means it's building momentum to eventually be able to go up. So it's important in those moments to not just throw in the towel and give up and say, Oh, I'm just like on this downward spiral spiral. This is it like if you can even just keep showing up on those dark days and maybe just do like one tiny thing that takes 30 seconds, knowing that those little things are going to help you to come out on the upswing it and like it's not going to be easy, but you have to keep that upswing in mind because everything impasses
Yeah, yeah, you're so right when you said when you're in it and it feels dark, it feels like it's gonna be forever. Like I was telling Kelsey, the first two weeks after I gave birth, it was such a shock to my system of like, no sleep, baby. Oh, my boob every two hours. Oh, my God is crying. I don't know why oh my god. Like, it was such a shock. I literally had like a spell of like, depression and fear and anxiety for those two weeks thinking, this is what parenthood is forever. Like, that's how our minds can fool us. I was like, Oh my God. Like, is this what's gonna be like for ever? Like, actually until they're 18? Like, that's what my mind was telling me. But it's like, of course not right. And actually, you reminded me of like the, when you're in the downswing when it feels harder and heavier and darker? Do those like little things that bring you light? Even if it's a little bit? You reminded me of the book The Slight Edge? Yeah, you have you learned Yeah, the compound effect. He has this beautiful, like, simple diagram, where he shows that every decision you make either takes you closer, like moves you in the upswing or moves you in the downswing. So for example, for me, personally, I know that if I choose to binge eat, I know it's going to that action is going to instead of me, like moving upward, if you're literally looking at an arrow traveling through time, the arrows going to start going downward. Because I know in my body, I'm going to feel like crap that night, I'm going to wake up maybe with a salt hangover, dehydrated, how's my day gonna be next day, and then am I going to take further actions, like my next action might be to like, you know, sleep in too late, and I miss my morning meditation, all these things, right. But if you take that, like, action of going for a 20 minute walk to get fresh air, get your blood moving, that's going to take that arrow slowly, slightly 1% up in the upswing, and like it's the compound effect of those little decisions that creates that upswing for you in your life. And even someone let's say like, there's someone who's like, so into personal development or so on top of their shit, like all their goals, like, let me work out, let me do this, guess what shit still happens, people pass pass away. Really hard moments still happen. But at least you're higher up in the upswing that you can then maybe have the tools within you have the consciousness within you to recover. Faster, easier. And I can't say faster and easier, because it's a whole new thing that you maybe haven't dealt with. Yeah, but at least you're already practicing those habits. And maybe it'll take you two days to have a really deep, dark moment. And then maybe third day, you're like, Okay, maybe I'll go for a time and a walk even though I'm depressed. But I'll do a 10 minute walk, but maybe someone who was so so low, it would take them two months to go for that 10 minute walk. So I don't know how we got into that run thinking like, just in general, I'm thinking, Okay, if a business owner right now is listening to this. And they're feeling like they're in the downswing or they're like, I'm so confused. I'm lost. I don't know what to do. I have no clarity like, Hey, guys, it's all gonna be okay. We all experience it. And yeah, I hope that anything that we said has helped you feel a bit more like, okay, there's a light at the tunnel, like, is there something that if that person was sitting in front of you that you would want to say to them, Kelsey,
I think what's most important is to just bring it back home to you in that moment and to say, what is something I can do that will bring me joy today? Because chances are if your business is stuck, it's because personally, you're feeling a bit stuck too. And I really believe that you can unlock so much momentum in the work that you do by feeling amazing and coming at your work from a place of vitality. So you know, whether that's asking yourself, okay, well, what's gonna be most fulfilling to me or bring me joy? And if the answer is to go out and get a coffee, amazing start there. Or maybe you do need to get back to the gym and start working out or sleep better, but I think if you can start with you as an individual, it's kind of incredible that it will ripple out into producing momentum in your business too. So if that person were in front of me, I would say to definitely, you know, just ask yourself the simple question of what can I do to bring myself joy today?
I love that. Oh my god. You you saying that just reminded me of Have you seen the documentary? studs? No. on Netflix, I
never even heard of it.
Oh my gosh, okay. It's spelt S T. Oh my gosh, this blanket so warm. I just took it off and I'm like s t u t Zed, and it's a therapy on a therapist. And so Jonah Hill has a theory are pissed that he found so much like, like, friggin joy and like enlightenment was like, oh my God changed my life, that he actually created a documentary, interviewing this therapist, and on his like techniques and tools that he offers his patients, patients, I don't know if it's the right word, because he takes his whole new approach to therapy, because he used to, when he was like, trained, his mentors would, you know, sit down with the patient for an hour, and then the patient would leave crying, distressed all that stuff. And then studs would ask. Yeah, can we do anything to help them a little bit? He's like, no, no, you can't help them, they have to feel it, they have to figure it out on their own, like, he's like, but aren't there tools to just like, give them something to do. So they start feeling better. And then something felt off to him. So he like created his whole, like, his way of doing it. And it's so frickin mind blowing when I was going through like this, like this time when I was on sabbatical. And I was just like, so like, you know, when you when you when you have someone that's like, so used to like working, being connected to the business, and then you disconnect from that, me. It's like, wait a second, you're like, who am I for a second, right. And it's like a little bit of a shock to the system I was in Barbados was amazing. You got to just be in nature and all of that. But there's still that like, gap of like, maybe I should just take time to self reflect, right. And I discovered this documentary, I watched it, it was freaking mind blowing the tools that he offers like that he teaches in there. And I wrote them down in this little notebook that I bought while in Barbados. And oh my gosh, by the way, the top of the notebook is so cute. It says, just trying to read it. Yeah, it says go forward in life with a twinkle in your eye and a smile on your face, but with great purpose in your heart. And I was like, my Bud Light. It's just so spoke so much. She was like, literally, you know, when you see something in a store, and that quote, like yells at you, you're like, that's exactly what I need to hear. Right?
No one wrote this for me. Yeah, pretty much. But he had
this tool, and I wrote it down. I think he calls it the string of pearls. And it's so smart, how he so he literally draws little diagrams for his patients so that they can have a visual as well. And then it looks more like real and attainable. In pretty much let me find it here. So the string of pearls is about, like actually remember it? Oh, here it is. So if you're like in this like really dark place, and you're just like, I don't know how to get out of it. He is like imagine, like a long string. And then there's one pearl on it. And your job is to just put the next pearl on. And it's like that next Pearl could be like, you know, we talked about like, exactly what you just said, like, like, do what you want, like, ask yourself, what will bring me joy, right? And like, put that next pearl on. Or maybe you're in your business, right? And you're like, I really just want 10 wedding bookings, for example. And you're just like, I don't know how to get there. It's like, put a pearl on and maybe call like a wedding dress shop and ask them if you could do some branding photos for them. Maybe they'll refer you or like, or reach out to a wedding planner you've worked with and ask them, if they have any clients that you think would like a little piece of action. It doesn't have to be big, give you small. And that string of pearls as you just imagine it in your head, you're continuing to progress that will like get you out of it. And I love that you said that. And then there's also this other tool he had, which was called the life force and he drew it out like a pyramid. So you have it here, the little pyramid and you saying that all people need three things to take care of like three things in order to have that lifeforce energy. And if you look at it as a pyramid at the bottom, it's the biggest part, the pyramid is like the foundation that holds everything else up. Take care of your body. We talked about those today, right? And we even talked about it. We're like every time we take care of our bodies, oh my god, so much inspiration and clarity flows. And it's like take care of your body through food, exercise, proper rest, sleep. Those are the things pretty basic. So if that's taken care of, then the next level in the middle of the pyramid is people. So you want to be connected. You want to be connected to community. You want to nurture your relationships. And isn't it funny how we were just talking about that too for like, why do we have this craving to be around people right? Like it's just that part of us and then at the top is you so your relationship with yourself and what you need and what brings you joy? So it's like I love that you said all All those things you're like, just ask yourself, what do you want to do and like in follow that intuitive nudge? Because if you really simplified in that sense of like, okay, if I'm taking care of my body, I'm connected to people, and I'm doing what I want. It's like, that's your lifeforce. Yeah. Isn't that amazing?
And to protect those three elements as much as possible in a day, especially if you feel like your lifeforce is drained a little bit, I think it's so important to just like, do that assessment of have I taken care of me yet, okay, if I've only taken care of me, but I'm not even socializing, talk to the people or get back to your people. And yeah,
so the first is always body, body, body first. And body being literally what you ingest, and how you treat treat it through like movement. Because think about it.
If you eat poorly, and you don't feel like strong and your body, you probably don't even want to go out to that next step. And like, be social and nurture your relationship. You just want to be inwards, because you're like, I feel crappy. So I don't want to be part of the community. Yeah.
Or like, I don't even feel energized. So it's like, I don't have energy for other people. Yeah, yeah. And that's really cool. You're not connected to that, like you're your body isn't taken care of, like, how are you going to even know how to connect to your intuition and know what you even want? Yeah, right. So cool. Have you ever tried like little intuitive adventures where it's like, you go out for a walk, let's say and you're just like, Okay, I'm just gonna listen to my intuition. You're like, it's I like a practicing. Because, yeah, it's a practice to learn how to listen to your intuition. So it's like, go right. Well, something's telling you to go right. I don't know why it doesn't make sense. I don't want to go right. But okay. All right. Have you ever done that?
I think I Yeah. So I it's funny, I was just having a conversation with a friend about this. And she's a new mom. And she's like, I don't get to do my intuitive walks as much anymore. But I was thinking, like, I think I do this every day when I walk my dog because I'll just like Look left straight or right. And I either let Abby guide the walk, and I'll say, which way do you want, oh, that's fine. Or I'll kind of like look each direction and usually there's a tree that's calling me or I like want to see the energy of downtown or I want to see the calmness of nature. So I'll kind of just do this like scan of my environment and usually one direction it's pulling me based on like, the attributes that that route could present so I don't know if I've like thought about it, like consciously but I think there's part of me that loves the intuitive like, wherever you want to go next. Yeah, you do that? I do
it not all the time. But yeah, sometimes and I have for sure, do it on wedding days. That's how I literally on wedding days. That's what I'm doing. 100% of the time I'm letting my intuition guide me. Just so fun. And but yeah, another like fun game or solution. For those of you listening if you're feeling that like stuckness of I don't know, I don't know what I want whatever like, like, you probably maybe you don't even know how to listen to your intuition. So like, play that little game go on a good day adventure. Like I'm just gonna listen to my intuition. Oh, should I get on that subway now? Okay, do I get off now? Okay, yeah, why not? Like, if I mean if you have kids, I mean, if you have kids, you could do a two tone thinking I'm like I could do that with that actually. Get that stroller
fan which I do you want to go? Yeah, no answer. Okay, all Jews are let him point in a direct.
Oh my god, it's so cute because he's pointing to everything, but he would lead me into a wall. Yeah. You're like, we can't go that direction. Yeah, I'll be like, okay, and I'll probably like a walk into the wall want to go that way to make them laugh? Concussion? Oh my gosh. So yeah,
this has been fun. Hopefully valuable too.
Yeah, I think so. All right. So I feel complete do you
Well wrap it up here and get our warm clothes on but like
me though, thank you, it's actually feel better. She's she's not chattering.
I think like if we could wrap up this conversation like one of the key points is to just make sure you have people who you can gather with and people who you feel can support you through the ebbs and flows of life because every chapter that we are alive is going to present itself with challenges and it is so important to just feel less alone during those challenges
and if you don't have those people if you don't feel like you have anyone I know what it's like to feel like you don't have anyone because you might not want to open up your WHY NOT MY don't want to burden anyone. You're it guess what, you can still find people you can still find someone. Like there's the beautiful thing about social media is you can literally find someone that you feel like you're in a same similar path, similar stage in business or life and Just connect and be like, Hey, do you want to swap branding photos together? If your two photographers like, yeah, you know, I think everybody really appreciates people's vulnerability when they open up and show their humaneness. So you're really, you know, you don't have anything to be scared of with that. So, yeah, if you don't have a support system, know that you can grow one and create one one step at a time, and maybe you can do the Perl exercise and put a pearl on every time you just reach out to someone or, you know, try to connect so, and then you're gonna say, what else are you gonna say? You're like, that's it. I think that's it. Okay.
I don't have any more words.
Don't have any more word. No, I
love that analogy. Because you're right. There are so many times when we feel like, you know, I just nobody understands me or I don't have anyone in my corner. But I think that analogy of what can I do to add a pearl to this necklace, whether that's texting one person or actually connecting with people through your Facebook or through LinkedIn, rather than just creeping or just, you know, getting out into the town you live in and maybe starting to socialize with the people at the coffee shop or starting to say hi, to more of your neighbors just so that you can feel like you do have the power to make a true connection each day.
Yeah, yeah. Well, it's so much fun. I don't know why I felt like cheers ing or micro. Cheers. Latest tap so that
your guys's ears. Thanks for listening, everybody. Yeah,
thank you. Oh, wait, Kelsey, we're can everyone find you?
Oh, I am on Instagram at Kelsey Rydell. and my website is Kelsey rydell.com. What about you?
I am Sarah Monica. Sarah Monica photo on Instagram and that Sarah? No h and with a que so hard to spell Monica Ohto.
I love it. And we'll link them in the show notes.
Indeed. Yay. One hour, one minute.
Oh, dang. Yeah, we went deep. Visionary. I know you you're a Health Net and you want to save money on the brands you love? Well, healthy planet is your one stop shop for all things healthy. They have everything from gluten free snacks to non toxic beauty products to supplements that are gonna help you focus during the work day, and they deliver straight to your doorstep. Being healthy has never been easier, more affordable or more convenient than this. So shop with healthy planet today and get 10% off your first order of $50 or more by using the code visionary 2022 at checkout that's visionary 2022 at checkout, so start saving today by heading to Healthy Planet canada.com and use the code visionary 2022 at checkout. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of visionary life. I love bringing you these conversations on a weekly basis. So it would mean so much to me. If you could help me out by rating and reviewing the show on either iTunes or Spotify. It just takes a second. And if you don't want to rate the show, you can also just take a screenshot of the episode and share it on your social media platform of choice tagging me at Kelseyreidl.com. I'll catch you in the next episode.
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